#12:
Drive Time
Besides
the “techno free” zones and “sitting in your house” that I described in Talk
Time #11, drive time has come to be a meaningful talk time for our family. (See
Tip #4: Who’s Got Their Shoes On? for more one-on-one vehicle talking tips.) In
this final post of this talk series, I just want to encourage families in
general to reduce the “independent” times in the vehicle and make drive time
more “community” time.
We
could never afford newer vehicles, complete with game systems or televisions
(we don’t even have game systems or televisions in our home either, come to
think of it). Thus, our drive time for many years included reading aloud,
listening to audios, playing road games, and, of course, talking. (Now with
computers, the kids sometimes write papers, watch movies, or play games while
we drive.) As is the case with most things that families cannot afford, not
being able to afford newer vehicles with electronics built in has had an
immensely positive result: community time vs alone time in the vehicle.
We
have had literally hundreds of hours of teaching and talking time with our kids
in our van through the years. We talk one-on-one if it is just Dad and child or
Mom and child, but the majority of our times in the van have been
community—times to read aloud and discuss what we are reading; listen to an
audio and share in stories and teachings together; and talk about family
history, our beliefs, current events, church sermons, family standards,
personal goals, ministry goals, relationship issues, and much more.
If
your family drive times are more like “islands in the stream” than “group
hugs,” we would encourage you to declare certain drive times as family times.
Just announce that on Sundays, for example, no games or independent activities
will be allowed but instead family time will be instituted. Buy some new audio
series’ that will interest everybody. Get some “Ungame” cards out of an old
“Ungame” in your closet or from Goodwill and read these allowed and discuss
them. Do whatever it takes to make drive time more family time---and more talk
time.
It
has been a joy to share with you our Twelve Terrific Times to Talk. There are
so many other opportunities that we need to take advantage of in order to get
into our children’s hearts. We just encourage you to do it! Talk. Listen.
Share. Teach. Our kids will not be here at home with us forever. Let’s make use
of the times that we have to share with them—and see if we can increase that
“fifteen minutes of meaningful time with a parent” per week statistic to hours
each week instead!
It is really true that parents must have time to bond with their sons and daughters.Thanks to have parents like you.
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