day fifty-eight: create read aloud times that work for your family

"There is more treasure in books than in all the pirate's loot on Treasure Island." Walt Disney

The question has come up about what our children do when we read aloud. Do they just sit for an hour and listen? Do they play quietly and listen? I will spend today's blog answering this question--and close with another "Joshua" story.

We used a "bus stop approach" with our children for a lot of our read alouds. With that, we start with the easiest books that we are doing that day (with pictures), and the littles sitting close to me while the olders are around listening but not right there on the sofa, necessarily. Then, the littles "get off the bus" as we move into harder materials (i.e. out of a picture book and into something harder, like a biography or an adventure story chapter book). The littles then can stay and listen and color, play with little figures, build legoes, etc. They do not have to stay--and they can do quiet activities if they do stay. We continued in this manner, "dropping kids off at the bus stop" as the materials got harder and harder.

Now that is when we did/do a full hour or more of various books. When we just read aloud from a chapter book, the kids who can do other things and still listen, often do (our littlest peels potatoes, cuts up apples, snaps green beans, etc. while I read aloud!). (We have had a couple of kids who always chose to just listen; their listening comprehension was not strong enough to multi task like that.) The girls would often quilt, work on their newsletter for young girls (laying it out on the computer), etc. This is the way we do audio books as well (everybody listening while building with legoes or putting together a puzzle, Dad bill paying; Mom editing; etc.).

With story time (picture books only with under twelves), we are usually snuggled in Mom's bed doing a stack of story books--and each child gets to pick once, except the "child of the day," who chooses two--the first one and the last one.

Additionally, we would often do a book one-on-one with a child for "discipleship time." For example, Dad and one of the boys would do a book about manhood. Dad and a daughter would do a book, such as What Every Daughter Wants Her Dad to Know (not sure of the exact title, sorry!). Mom and a daughter would do a purity book (like Elisabeth Eliot's Passion and Purity). During these times, we just sat close and read and talked (not doing other things while listening).

There is no right and wrong way to do read alouds, and you will certainly want to do what fits with your family dynamics. Read aloud has given our family great joy--and I am so grateful that we were introduced to this type of parenting twenty-seven years ago when Joshua was a baby. Thank-you, Lord!

Now, my "Joshua" story. When Joshua was around twelve, he decided that he was too old for afternoon story time. (Our children still listen during our Bible/character read aloud regardless of their ages, but the kids do eventually graduate from story time since it is mostly picture books.) As story time rolled around, and we all gathered in my bed, I asked him if he was sure that he didn't want to join us. "No, I'll just stay out in the living room and read my book."

We started in with our first picture book, then the second. Before I knew it, I saw a shadow in the hallway. Joshua was standing in the hall--down a ways, but still within earshot of our reading. By the fourth book, he was standing outside the doorway. A little later, he was sitting on the floor inside the doorway. I asked him if he wanted to join us: "No, I'll just rest on the end of the bed. I'm tired." So he lay across the foot of the bed...and you guessed it, before the end of story time, he was snuggled up with us enjoying afternoon story time! Today, if he stops by the house, and we're lying in bed reading, he will still drape himself across the foot of the bed and just listen and smile...and that make me smile now, too--and cry, of course, as well.