day fifty: tell your kids from the beginning that you are all blessed to be a part of your family

“The only rock I know that stays steady, the only institution I know that works is the family.” Lee Iacocca


About a dozen years ago, we went to a parenting seminar (we never outgrew parenting seminars!) in which the teacher said that we should tell our kids that our family is the greatest and go on and on about how wonderful it is to be a member of our family. He even said, “When you are all in the vehicle and driving somewhere, say aloud, ‘Which family is the best family ever?’” Then we should all chant and yell, “Ours is!”


Ray and I looked at each other and burst out laughing. Was this teacher a mouse in our full sized van, “Big Blue”? Ever since we can remember, and certainly since our oldest children were preschoolers and primary age children, we always gathered in the van and shouted out how great our family was, how glad we are to be a part of it, etc.


“Which family is the best family ever?”


“Ours is!”


“Who loves to be in our family?”


“We do!”


“Who has the best brothers and sisters?”


“I do!”






It sounds a little strange to read it—and unless you were there in our van with happy, giggling children and overjoyed parents, you can’t fully appreciate those wonderful times. But they were wonderful.


Children have a tendency to believe whatever they are told. So let’s tell them good things! How much better to start them off with a positive outlook on their family than on a complaining “other people have it better than I do” attitude that is so prevalent among kids today.


Our children always believed that we had an awesome family, in part because we “chanted” it (!) and in part because we did! We tried to do the many “positive parenting strategies” that I have been writing about. And we told them—frankly, that God has truly blessed us with a family and a Savior.


We wanted them to be happy that they were born into the Reish family. We wanted them to see how blessed they were to have such incredible siblings. We wanted them to appreciate their parents, who were dedicating a huge portion of their lives to raising them in the best environment we could create.


Maybe yelling out how blessed your family is seems awkward to you. However, we can all use a little more thankfulness and a little less complaining. And our children can certainly benefit from seeing us be grateful and happy that God has given us each other. Something as small as, “I am so happy that God gave us each other” or “We are certainly blessed to have the family we do” is a good place for us parents to start.


Obviously, it takes a lot more than chanting to create a happy home. But verbalizing our blessings can be a part of the making of a happy home. And convincing our children from the earliest ages that they truly are fortunate to be born into our family is a great way to get them on our team from the beginning.