Saturday, September 11, 2010

day 228: “mega cooking” resources part i of ii




I have a few resources that I have used to learn to mega cook (“freezer cooking”) to introduce you to today and tomorrow.




"Make-a-Mix Cookery”--This is where I started with my mega cooking. It is not specifically mega cooking, but it has many “mixes” (i.e. Italian meat, hamburger mixes, “braised beef cube mix,” white sauce balls, homemade “Bisquick,” and much more) that I have used over and over through the years. I am on my third copy (due to excessive use!), and I highly recommend this for home cooks who are serious about efficiency cooking, “mix making,” and more “do it yourself” type of cooking. Available here http://www.amazon.com/Make-Mix-Cookery-Make-Mixes/dp/0895860074



“Once a Month Cooking” book(s): This is the first real “freezer cooking” book I got (following Make a Mix). Many people complain that the recipes use too many convenience foods (i.e. Velveeta, refrigerated biscuit dough, etc.). However, if a person desired to do more “homemade” cooking and use this book, it can be easily done. (And if one is a homemade type of cooker, she should be able to adapt them easily.) We usually made our own “cream soups” because of the expense of buying dozens of cans of soup. We often made our own “Bisquick” and just made the biscuits ourselves for things like chicken and biscuits, etc. I say that to say, that the recipes are adaptable, but they are simple for someone just beginning “mega cooking.” Not nearly as daunting as my “cycles,” this is a great place to start.


Follow the link below for the large variety of “Once a Month” cooking books—crock pot, low fat, desserts, holidays, and more.






http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=pd_lpo_k2_dp_sr_sq_top?ie=UTF8&keywords=once%20a%20month%20cooking%20book&index=blended&pf_rd_p=486539851&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-1&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=0312584784&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=0G427EPW99S64QZEGH16

Friday, September 10, 2010

day 235: keeping motivated part v of v—trusting god


Lastly, to stay motivated, trust God. Maybe this should have been first, but it is probably right where I often put it. We as parents sometimes have such a difficult time trusting God, especially when things do not turn out as we anticipated.


Ray and I were recently talking about two couples who had huge impacts on our parenting and family life. We have found out lately that both couples have “given up”—in their own ways—on this idea of Christian parenting. Oh, they haven’t necessarily turned from the faith; they just gave up on many of the things they taught us about passing this faith on to our children.


The first one basically saw that this parenting thing wasn’t working, got disillusioned with things, and started taking the easy way out on everything. It was easier to join the kids than it was to train them.


The second one became angry at God when their kids were not turning out like they thought they would. They are angry, bitter, and cynical. We’ve been told that they are not the same people at all anymore—that we would hardly recognize them.


What made these two couples decide that this wasn’t worth it if it didn’t turn out the way they always dreamed it would? The same thing that makes us give in to a child and just give him his own way rather than sticking to our guns on a discipline issue. The same thing that forces us to extend the curfew a little longer when the sixteen year old gives us a hard time—it’s not like it’s going to make any difference. They aren’t catching anything we’re trying to give them here anyway, we think.


Sure, those couples made big, long-term decisions to skip the teaching in one case and be bitter in the other. But we make those same types of decisions all the time when the going gets rough. Little ones, yes, but similar anyway.


I pondered these two families whom I had nearly idolized for a long time and came to the conclusion that I, too, often find myself heading down the same path when I parent in an outcome-based way only. In other words, if I dig in and do what I know I should do only if things are going the way I planned for them to, I, too, could become lackadaisical and/or bitter.


I can’t parent out of fear—or out of demands that God do what I want when I want it. I have to parent in faith. I have to trust God regardless of how things look. I lose my motivation quickly when I base my efforts on how things are going on a daily basis. I am working hard at this Christian parenting not because if I do everything will go how I want it to, but because it is what I am called to do—and I will trust God for the outcome—and the motivation to stick with it.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

day 234: keeping motivated part iv of v—take it easy—but not too easy


On this next-to-the-last entry concerning motivation, I want to tackle two extremes: taking it easy but not too easy!


It is all too common for people to want to do as little as possible—and still get good results. We see this all the time in Christian circles—the parents who let the church do all the discipling of their kids, hoping that this is enough; the parents who homeschool, sure that simply keeping them at home will solve the problems (but not truly addressing the problems); etc. In that vein, I hesitate to tell parents to cut themselves some slack. It is our experience that parents need told to dig in, put your shoulder to the grindstone, do the next right thing, etc. more often than not.


However, there are definitely those out there who do not cut themselves any slack; who work day and night, sure that their labors will make everything okay, etc. Those people, obviously, need to relax a little!


So, as far as motivation is concerned, we need to cut ourselves some slack AND work our tails off! How’s that for compromise?


Let me summarize this with a little advice and links to some past entries:


1. Cut yourself some slack; take time off when needed, guilt-free. When I had many small children, I always knew when I was working too hard, not relaxing or not taking enough breaks—and Ray knew it too! We tried to fit in breaks and easy nights, etc. for me as needed. You can only go full steam for so long—and then you either need relaxation or recharging (conferences, books, etc. are good for that) or both. (See former post for taking breaks from little ones’ needs: http://positiveparenting3-6-5.blogspot.com/2010/05/day-148-time-off-from-little-ones.html )


2. Watch out for time robbers. I know it can feel like you have many, many years to do these parenting things! Time doesn’t feel so constrained when you only have little ones. It feels like you have forever! But you do not. Take it from someone who is, well, more mature (smile…). It is so easy to think that what I do today doesn’t affect things that much, that I will have plenty of time later. And to let “time robbers” come in and steal our time (and with it, our motivation since when things get out of control with priorities, we often feel less motivated). See previous posts about this (there are actually four in a row; this one is first): http://positiveparenting3-6-5.blogspot.com/2010/02/day-thirty-four-change-your-television.html


3. Don’t take on extras or unreasonable goals that detract from what you really need to do. I am terrible at having an all or nothing mentality—if we can’t have a cleaning hour that I had in mind for tonight, I don’t want to do just fifteen minutes and move on. We may as well just forget it. That mentality has hurt me in my parenting—and I have had to learn the “little bits here and there” method in many areas of life. I often have lofty goals and projects in mind that I want to do—my way. One thing that our early mentors stressed to us that really stuck with us is the concept of not taking on too many things. I see moms do this all the time, and I want to shout, “Stop. That’s too much. You won’t be able to do what you want to do with your kids. You will be too overwhelmed. It’s just not worth it!” I have talked in detail about our priority purging on Positive Parenting 3*6*5. I have had to say no to many, many things through the years in order to do what I knew I needed to do. While others would sew beautiful clothes, decorate their homes, attend ladies’ Bible studies, etc., I was just doing the daily grind. (There is nothing in the world wrong with any of those—it’s just that with Ray’s work schedule for the first fifteen years of our marriage, those things were incompatible with our life.) Now I have two hobbies I adore—ballroom dancing and scrapbooking. However, those have to be kept in check as well. We simply can’t do everything—and we lose motivation for the mundane, daily grind when the more appealing things are calling to us. If you want to keep motivation strong—say no to many outside things so that you are not overwhelmed and shortchanging your family goals. (See more about prioritizing at http://positiveparenting3-6-5.blogspot.com/search/label/Organization






Tomorrow is the last day of motivation—trusting God. If we could truly get a glimpse of our calling, regardless of our circumstances, our motivation would never waiver!

day 233: keeping motivated part iii of v—motivated with your spouse

I am grateful every day for a husband with the same goals, similar motivation, identical work ethic, consistent parenting methods, and deep faith. I know this isn’t always the case—and it obviously isn’t impossible to keep motivated in this parenting endeavor as a single parent. There are people everywhere doing it. And I believe that God gives the grace for each situation when it is needed; thus, I can’t imagine doing what single parents do, but then I’m not in that scenario either.


If you are a married Christian parent with a spouse who also wants to do the hard work of Christian parenting, regardless of the difficulties you face, you are very blessed indeed. There are a couple of specific areas in marriage that have helped us to keep motivated:




1. Be one in your marriage, as well as in your parenting. Ray and I are seldom unmotivated or discouraged at the same time. Thank the Lord! We need each other desperately in order to keep the momentum to finish this parenting race with our last three “little boys”! We will discuss Christian marriage more thoroughly this fall and especially next year in honor of our thirtieth wedding anniversary. In the area of motivation, though, just knowing that someone is there with you, embracing the same goals and methodology, is a huge motivator. Talk about every aspect of parenting all the time. When one is down, the other can motivate and encourage. And vice versa.


2. Do not view the husband as the breadwinner and the wife as the child raiser. We are both parents—and we are in this thing together. One of the major downfalls of so much teaching on husband and wife roles in the conservative church, to us, has been the whole idea that the husband is the “head” and the “breadwinner” and the wife is the “subordinate” and the “child raiser.” Yes, the Bible does teach that a man is to be the head of the home—but why? He is to be the head of the home to serve and love his family as Christ loved the church—not to be the boss. With the emphasis on the head and breadwinning aspects of marriage, the husband is often thought of us above parenting—or too busy making a living to parent. If a wife is a homemaker, her job is homemaking. However, parenting is not part of the job description of the homemaker. Parenting is part of the job description of the parents, plural. I am so grateful that we were taught about the servant-leadership required of the husband to truly “love as Christ loved the church.” Ray has always considered us co-parents, and, yes, even co-homeschoolers. Teaching, training, talking, disciplining…these are both the husband’s and wife’s responsibilities when they have children—and should not be relegated to the wife alone. It is difficult for a mother to stay motivated in her parenting endeavor if she feels that she is doing it alone. Husbands, if you want to help your wife stay motivated in her parenting, co-parent with her.


More motivating tips tomorrow. I wish I could just reach into every reader’s heart and give you each a huge dose of motivation—along with perseverance, long-term visualization, hope, joy, love, patience, wisdom—all the things I have felt so needy for in my parenting. God bless you all.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

day 233: keeping motivated part iii of v—motivated with your spouse

I am grateful every day for a husband with the same goals, similar motivation, identical work ethic, consistent parenting methods, and deep faith. I know this isn’t always the case—and it obviously isn’t impossible to keep motivated in this parenting endeavor as a single parent. There are people everywhere doing it. And I believe that God gives the grace for each situation when it is needed; thus, I can’t imagine doing what single parents do, but then I’m not in that scenario either.


If you are a married Christian parent with a spouse who also wants to do the hard work of Christian parenting, regardless of the difficulties you face, you are very blessed indeed. There are a couple of specific areas in marriage that have helped us to keep motivated:




1. Be one in your marriage, as well as in your parenting. Ray and I are seldom unmotivated or discouraged at the same time. Thank the Lord! We need each other desperately in order to keep the momentum to finish this parenting race with our last three “little boys”! We will discuss Christian marriage more thoroughly this fall and especially next year in honor of our thirtieth wedding anniversary. In the area of motivation, though, just knowing that someone is there with you, embracing the same goals and methodology, is a huge motivator. Talk about every aspect of parenting all the time. When one is down, the other can motivate and encourage. And vice versa.


2. Do not view the husband as the breadwinner and the wife as the child raiser. We are both parents—and we are in this thing together. One of the major downfalls of so much teaching on husband and wife roles in the conservative church, to us, has been the whole idea that the husband is the “head” and the “breadwinner” and the wife is the “subordinate” and the “child raiser.” Yes, the Bible does teach that a man is to be the head of the home—but why? He is to be the head of the home to serve and love his family as Christ loved the church—not to be the boss. With the emphasis on the head and breadwinning aspects of marriage, the husband is often thought of us above parenting—or too busy making a living to parent. If a wife is a homemaker, her job is homemaking. However, parenting is not part of the job description of the homemaker. Parenting is part of the job description of the parents, plural. I am so grateful that we were taught about the servant-leadership required of the husband to truly “love as Christ loved the church.” Ray has always considered us co-parents, and, yes, even co-homeschoolers. Teaching, training, talking, disciplining…these are both the husband’s and wife’s responsibilities when they have children—and should not be relegated to the wife alone. It is difficult for a mother to stay motivated in her parenting endeavor if she feels that she is doing it alone. Husbands, if you want to help your wife stay motivated in her parenting, co-parent with her.




More motivating tips tomorrow. I wish I could just reach into every reader’s heart and give you each a huge dose of motivation—along with perseverance, long-term visualization, hope, joy, love, patience—all the things I have felt so needy for in my parenting. God bless you all.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

day 232: keeping motivated part ii of v—see the long term and role models

There are over a dozen main areas that we would like to touch on about keeping motivation when your kids are little. I will do a few of these each day as space permits.


First of all, a note about motivation with little kids. It is tough! That’s all there is to it. We live in an immediate gratification society. This is not just in our food and entertainment---it invades every area of our lives. We have come to need immediate feedback or immediate solvency. This has made it especially difficult in things in which the rewards are infrequent or further down the road. And that sums up parenting small children to a tee.


Sure, we get the immediate feedback of their sweetness, their obedience, their cleverness, etc. And I am not saying that those things are not rewarding—they certainly are. However, the long term goal in Christian parenting is raising children to become responsible, loving, selfless Christian adults. And those rewards are w---aaa-----y down the road when you have three kids three and under.


It can feel as though what you do today doesn’t matter that much. It can make us laxed and even lazy. And it can feel impossible. (“I can’t do this anyway, so why work so hard???)


Therefore, we need examples, role models, encouragement, long term vision, etc. to keep doing what we know we should be doing—even when it is easier to take the less demanding path whenever it is offered.


1. Look into your children’s hearts. They are so precious—this will reveal the great need to keep doing what you are doing. Oftentimes, we can’t see ten or twenty years beyond today. We can’t link today’s devotions, talks, or discipline with the whole concept of “raising children to become responsible, loving, selfless Christian adults.” It is then that we have to look into our kids’ hearts and know that we can make a difference in those hearts. And accept each little success as a reward for the job you are doing now---when the two year old stops saying “no” to commands you give; when the three year old says, “Mommy, come see how I made my bed all by myself today,” and yes, especially, when the seven year old says, “Daddy, I want to accept Jesus too!”


2. See the intense years as needful and crucial. These are the years that the foundations of Christian character, self control, and spiritual development are laid. Speaking to groups, we often hear people say, “I can’t wait until my kids are old enough to really read and discuss the Bible,” or “I can’t wait to be able to have heart to heart talks with teens,” etc. That’s great—to look forward to those training years in a positive way. However, the real crucial ones are often right in front of us. Ages two to five are foundational to laying the groundwork for obedience, respect, and contentment. Ages five to ten are the basis of giving a love for learning about God and living in a way that pleases God. Those early years are SO important. I can’t stress them enough. If you only have preschoolers, change your mindset from the “daily grind” to “daily training.” Truly, what you do today has a huge effect on your kids’ futures.


3. Try to find role models with older children—those you can look to that will encourage you that all of your hard work is worth it. Ray and I thank the Lord jointly and individually every week for the influences that he placed in our lives every step of the way. We are some of those rare people who were actually discipled in an extremely intimate way. We had three couples in our lives when we were first born again who helped us nearly daily learn to live this Christian life. As we had children, we had a mentor couple who came and stayed with us for a week or two each year for several years in a row and taught us to “do what I do” in terms of parenting and faith training of children (and in marriage). We also had other young families who had wonderful children a few years older than ours—and we wanted to be just like them! Additionally, we went to parenting and homeschooling seminars in which the speakers had older children (teens and pre-teens) who were respectful, obedient, character-filled kids. We knew what we wanted in our parenting because we surrounded ourselves with role models. Role models who have children who have been raised in strong Christian homes give us hope that this Christian parenting really can be done. They keep us going when we think that what we do doesn’t really matter. They remind us that our calling is everlasting and crucial. Along those same lines, try to find like-minded parents to have as friends and confidants. Being in a small group with like-minded moms, going through parenting classes together, discussing character training all the time, etc. has helped me immensely in my parenting.






Tomorrow—more tips to keep motivated. Not to keep motivated because someday everything will be perfect—but to keep motivated because Christian parenting is one of the most important things we can do. And because it’s worth it.

Monday, September 6, 2010

day 231: how do you keep motivation going strong, part i of v

I know I said we were switching to study skills—and we really are. I have fifty pages of notes, outlines, and articles that I have done on this topic…so it will not be a matter of whether we will do study skills here, but rather where to wind it down. I want to help families with their kids’ study skills but not give so much information it becomes overwhelming. Pray for me! 


However, before we dig in to those study skills (next week, honest!), I have been pondering something that my niece and her husband asked me and Ray at a family get together this weekend: How did you keep motivation going strong when your kids were little? How did you (Donna) get up and do everything you wanted and needed to every day with all those needs and all of those demands? How did Ray get up early and teach kids, then go to work, then come home and serve all evening too? Didn’t you just want to be lazy sometimes? Didn’t you just want to do what you wanted to do sometimes? Didn’t you just plain not want to do it at times?


We gave them the short answer—see everything as a big part of a future, unseen-as-yet picture; do the next thing; see others who have done it; take breaks, etc. etc. But I have since thought of more ideas about this topic and want to share it here over the next week.


My niece and her husband have their hands full even more than we did fifteen years ago—they have the same number of kids twelve and under as we did; however, they have three kids three and under—and those demands are huge—never-ending, and extremely tiring. Therefore, I hate to give pat answers. I never liked receiving pat answers—just do what you need to do; keep going; it’s not as hard as it seems; it’s worth it. All of that is true, but I always wanted more than one liners—I wanted the nuts and bolts, and I know many young parents still want the same.


So, today I will give the “pat” answers, if you will. The one liners that I truly believe are pertinent to this discussion. Then over the next week, I will try to put those one liners into motivation, inspiration, and “tools” that are useable.






1. Attack the first hour of the day first.


2. Watch out for time robbers.


3. Attack one thing at a time. Attack the most crucial, pressing matter(s) first, then move on to the next


4. Cut yourself some slack. Take time off when needed.


5. Don’t take on extras or unreasonable goals that detract from what you really need to do.


6. Try to find role models with older children---those you can look to that will encourage you that all of your hard work is worth it and will pay off later.


7. Look into your children’s hearts. They are so precious. This will reveal the great need to keep doing what you are doing.


8. See each need you meet, each task you carry out, each lesson you teach, each heart you touch as of eternal value—not just for the here and now.


9. Spend time with your spouse. Be one in your marriage, as well as in your parenting.


10. Do not view the husband as the breadwinner and the wife as the child raiser. We are both parents—and we are in this thing together.


11. See the intense years as needful and crucial. These are the years that the foundations of Christian character, self control, and spiritual development are laid.


12. Trust God.






You can do this!!! It is so worth it! Things will never be perfect…we have things to deal with even now with our kids (grown ones who still need discipling and ones at home who need us daily in many areas of life) every week, but it is worth it!


I thought it was so hard, that the intense years would never pass. But we kept at it….just kept on doing the same things, the same hard things, day in and day out, knowing that the little glimpses of rewards we saw and the joy that small children bring would some day be bigger glimpses of rewards…and joy unspeakable.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

day 230: introducing study skills—slowing down activities for all

In winter I get up at night


And dress by yellow candle-light.


In summer quite the other way


I have to go to bed by day.


~Robert Louis Stevenson






It’s that time of year! School has started for another academic year. The weather is changing. Days are getting shorter. And we are running kids everywhere!


How do you develop good study and work habits while running kids from one activity to another? You don’t! Think about it. When you fill your personal schedule too full, do you consistently do things around the house that need done? Do you fix nutritious, eat-at-home meals? Do you get to bed at a decent time and get up when you need to in order to have good mornings before the day’s activity? No…because it is basically not possible to develop good habits of study and work when you overcrowd your schedule. The same is true of our children.


If we want our kids to develop good study habit and work routines, we must be sure that their schedules are not too jam-packed to make those goals realities. Many experts nowadays (Kevin Leman and Ray and Donna Reish (! LOL!) included) are advocating the slow down method with our children. We adopted Leman’s one activity per child per semester guideline long before we ever read it in his book—and it has worked wonderfully for our family. It allows us to have three or four evenings a week together at home—family dinner, discussion, homework help, read alouds, movie nights, chore times, family work, business work, problem solving, relationship developing, and more.


It might be too late for you to adopt this lifestyle for the fall—but please consider it for the second semester. It gives us time to teach our children those important things—and time for them to learn to develop good study habits and work routines.


I will leave you today with an excerpt from Anne Kroeker’s “Not So Fast”:***





"Imagine your child wrote a college application essay that began something


like this:






'I lived a deliciously slow childhood. My siblings and I took long walks in


woods and caught fireflies in jars in the summer. We would wade in the


creek and stare at pond skaters skimming the water’s surface. In winter,


after tromping over piles of snow, we curled up in front of the fireplace


with books and read all afternoon with no noises other than the subtle


swoosh of a page being turned. We prayed often—at dinner and


bedtime and anytime we felt the urge to worship or be thankful or ask


for help. By draping sheets over a clothes line, we imageindd we were in


an army barracks, fighting in the Revolutionary War. Life was slow and


sweet, full of spontaneity and creativity; embracing a natural approach to


learning as part of everyday life, and mingling reading and play with


meaningful work.'






What do you suppose the Harvard admissions office would say to that?


Would they dismiss it as a poetic framing of ridiculous underachievement,


or would they celebrate it? Would they embrace someone who benefited


from a real childhood, full of wonder?






{Actually, they have indicated that they possibly would!} .....the


former dean of students at Harvard himself sent out a letter to all


incoming freshman recently, an essay, entitled, “Slow Down: Getting


More Out of Harvard by Doing Less.” ….the hypothetical “slowed down


childhood” in the earlier paragraph sounded a little like it was written by a


person who already enjoyed some of the {recommendations in the


Harvard article}."






People everywhere are starting to recognize the desperate need we
have to slow things down for our kids. We hope you will start to
recognize it too.






So, if you do have time in the evenings at home, how do you help your
children develop good study habits and work routines? I’m going to
pull out some of my old “study skills” articles and workshop notes and
dig in to give you some ideas in the coming days.

***Note: The formatting on the "one hundred word or more quotation" in this post is not correct. I had to just use quotation marks since I could not get the indenting format to work on the blog. I say this because I try to use correct grammar and punctuation on here as much as possible. (I am, after all, a language arts curriculum author! :) )


day 229: a+ dads...rerun

After listening to Ray sit and talk with one of our kids for literally a couple of hours…just talking, talking, talking…I ran across his Father’s Day post from June, and seeing that we have almost doubled our fans since then, decided to run it again as a sort of “back to school” inspirational for dads.



Moms and Dads both have the possibility of influencing our children tremendously. Ray discusses three of these ways (three A’s!) below….I pray that you will find help in it and that you will send it on to other dads who can benefit from learning the power of availability, awareness, and activity with their children.




There are three A’s that I have found in raising seven children ages 11 through 27 over the past two decades—three A’s that can lead to being an A+ dad for your children. (Pardon the “schoolish” expression; I’m not kidding when I say that everything becomes school around the Reishes!)




1. Available—so many of the statistics above point to this factor. Dads, we just need to be available. We need to say no to the good in order to do the best. We need to look at our children’s at home years for what they are—eighteen years or so in which other things must be put on the back burner (if needed) in order to be available for our kids. Here are some ways that I have found to make myself more available for my wife and kids:






a. For little ones—large amounts of time are not needed here—just short snatches and a lot of them—a few minutes after work; stories and kisses at bedtime; start traditions with your children that cause them to realize that you are available for them.






b. Middlers—you be the driver whenever possible and talk, talk, talk. Let them know that you are driving them to their event because the few minutes that you would have in the car with them is worth more to you than something else. (If you started talking when they were “little ones,” talking with you will become second nature to them.)






c. Olders—shooting hoops in the driveway most nights when my son was sixteen to eighteen gave us an opportunity to talk that might otherwise have not been found; make time for these older kids. When my older kids were little, I had a few minutes with each one before bed that we called our “Malachi time”---based on Malachi 4:6 in which the hearts of the father are turned to the children and vice versa. Establishing “Malachi time” twenty years ago has given me relationships with my young adult daughters that I quite possibly would not have had if I hadn’t sought them out when they were toddlers—and continued to be available to them throughout their growing up years.








2. Aware—we fathers need to be much more aware of what is going on in our children’s lives than we do. My wife can read our children like a book. She will often say, “We need to talk to ____ about how he is feeling about ___. I can tell something is a little bit off there and I think he is hurting.” How does she know these things? I have purposed to become a student of my children, so to speak. To be aware of their feelings, their friends, their interests, their influences, their needs, their spiritual condition, and much more. Awareness begins with questions. Asking questions about those areas in which you need to be more aware can lead to many insights that you might otherwise miss. (Also, ask your wife—she’ll know for sure!)




3. Activity—our kids make choices everyday to hang with peers, go to certain events, etc. or spend time with their families. Oftentimes, we have not made ourselves available, so our kids pick friends and outsiders by default. However, we have found that if we want our kids to want to be with us and want to stay home more (thus, affording us more opportunities to influence them in godly ways), we need to provide activities for them that are fun, healthy, family-oriented, and more. In the past ten years, when our older children and middlers were teens, we have purposely spent more money on “activity” with them than we did on other things that many of our peers enjoy. We might not have the nicest vehicles in the neighborhood, and we have a small, extremely modest home; however, our kids know that being with us is the “happening” place. That we will “do” things with them—go to movies, play basketball, swim, attend plays, visit museums, go out for dinner, take walks, and more. As we partake of activities with our children, we have more and more opportunities to see into their hearts and influence it for good.






Obviously, there are many more factors that bring about the A+ father—but some of those do not start with A! And this is a “short,” daily blog (at least that is what I keep telling my wife, the primary author of it!). However, if we would get up tomorrow and purpose to apply these three A’s to our fatherhood, I think we would all reap a harvest of closeness, opportunities for spiritual training, mentoring, and more.


Tomorrow—mega cooking resource reviews and introductions. Thanks for joining us!